Hard Is Not the Same Thing as Bad

May 29, 2023
“All suffering is hard. But not all hard things are suffering,” writes Halberstadt (M Is for Mama) in this heartfelt call for Christian moms to reframe their attitude toward parenting. The author, a mother of 10, recalls feeling emotionally wrung out after yet another toddler meltdown eight years ago, when she began to wonder if the “seemingly meaningless melodramas were not a punishment but a mercy from the Lord”—a way God was growing her empathy and patience. In brief, upbeat sections, Halbert outlines this philosophy, encouraging readers to “look for God’s goodness when we feel stuck” and be grateful that God has “filled our mother hearts with an aching love that threatens to burst”; to “be the adult when we want to throw tantrums” by owning the “maturity... the Lord has entrusted to us”; and to “reflect God’s integrity” by modeling moral behavior for one’s children. Halberstadt’s advice is animated by genuine religious passion, and readers will trust her warts-and-all parenting wisdom, which is leavened by flashes of humor that keep things from getting preachy (“You mean, we’re not victims of our children’s tendency to upchuck an entire lunch of undigested chicken quesadillas an hour into a road trip?”). Moms in need of a faith-based, can-do parenting approach will find it here.